“Gamers are too lazy to engage in real life!” says pizza delivery company
British gamers admit to missing funerals, turning down sex and even urinating into BOTTLES to stay in their video world
Gamers across the country are gearing up for the launch of the Xbox One and PlayStation 4 consoles and new research has found many are willing to miss out on real-world events to play their favourite games.
Almost half of male gamers admitted they have turned down sex to continue playing, while a fifth of female gamers said they’d missed weddings and hen dos.
More disgustingly, one in seven gamers confessed to relieving themselves in an empty drinks bottle to avoid having to leave the room with gamers in Birmingham among the worst offenders.
Important science news from the Daily Mail here, with the revelation that gamers can sacrifice a huge amount of time and an awful lot of dignity at the alter of their console worship. No amount of real life can get in the way of their obsession, as this story paid for by a takeaway delivery service clearly convinces us:
The research was commissioned by Domino’s Pizza to celebrate the launch of Microsoft’s Xbox One on Friday and Sony’s PlayStation 4 the week after…
Domino’s spokesman Simon Wallis said: ‘With the number of new launches coming up this month, including PS4 and Xbox One, we’re expecting a spike in orders from across the country as gamers batten down the hatches and prepare to stay in and test out their new high-tech gadgets.’
That’s right – if you’ve exciting things to do like celebrate the launch of a new console, why bother doing menial things like cooking your own food – that’s what Domino’s are for! Pay no attention to the fact that Domino’s have added to a deeply-ingrained negative stereotype of gamers as disgusting slobs disengaged from real life, because, y’know, pizza!