Tag Archives: Rory McKeown

“Everybody is finding better lives abroad!” says ex-pat support company

More Brits are moving away from the UK for good – because of the terrible weather

RAIN, rain and more rain – it’s the wet stuff that’s making many of us move from the UK for good.

Rainy summers and depressing winters are proving too much for some Brits, who emigrate to sun-kissed climates to get away from it all.

But as we’re emigrating in our droves, record numbers of migrants are moving to the British Isles to start a new life.

Source: Daily Star, 28th August 2015

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It seems that as the migrant refugee crisis continues at Calais, the supposed flow of traffic between the UK and the continent isn’t all one way, as droves of Brits flee these shores for less rainy climes. Reports of the idyllic lifestyle to be found abroad as an ex-pat deserve no additional pinches of salt, not even when the source of this particular piece of PR has so clear an agenda:

The UK is a friendly nation as it ranks ahead of countries like Germany and Switzerland in its openness to migrants, according to InterNations.

I hadn’t heard of InterNations either, so I decided to look them up – according to their website, “InterNations helps expats to feel at home abroad, meet people and find information about their new environment.”

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It’s not hard to see why InterNations might want to persuade us that all the cool kids are becoming migrants and ex-pats, and that all the coolest ex-pats are part of the InterNations community. In fact, here’s the head of InterNations to persuade us further:

Malte Zeeck, chief executive of InterNations, told Daily Star Online the UK is becoming a far more expensive proposition for people to live in.

He said: “InterNations is a social network for ex-pats worldwide. We have 1.8million members and we thought it would be a good idea to ask members about the different aspects of life abroad.

Way to get your whole sales pitch into the first sentence of your response, Malte.

“In the UK, the weather played a big role and the top reasons for moving was the climate, the cost of living, and personal safety and crime. For cost of living it ranks 51st out of 64 countries when it comes to housing. It’s really costly.

“While I think that Britain is popular among ex-pats for job security, there is always the challenge of the question ‘can I really afford this life style?’. That’s definitely something a lot of people are considering. The positive factors are outweighing the negative factors for the hope of a better life in the UK but in the long run it’s quite negative.”

There we have it – in the long run, living in the UK is a negative experience, and we should all up sticks and leave the country immediately to find a better life in more a less hostile country. It’s nice to see the tabloid newspapers so supportive of that idea for a change.

“Sport is better than sex!” says sport betting company

Nearly 1/4 of Premier League fans skip sex sessions with partners to watch the footy

PREMIER League footy fans would rather watch a match than score with their partners in bed, a survey has revealed.

A total of 23% of Premier League fans in a committed relationship would pass up sex to watch the likes of Rooney, Costa and Sterling do the biz on the pitch.

Source: Daily Star, 12th August 2015

Cometh the return of the football season, cometh the trotting out of the age-old stereotypes around men putting their team before their partner. If we were in any doubt that the story is nothing more than an advert for a sports betting company, we have a helpful spokesperson to clarify things for us:

A spokesman for sportsBettingOnline.net, which commissioned the survey, said: “When Match of the Day comes on the telly on a Saturday night it’s a real battleground in the households of football supporters across the UK.

“Often one partner wants to end their Saturday by getting close to their other half while for many it’s a time to get close to Gary Lineker and catch up on the latest from the Premier League.

“It must be hard when you love one woman but adore 11 men.”

The Daily Star weren’t the only paper to pick up on the story, with The Sun and the Southern Daily Echo running it too. Indeed, a moment on Google turns up the original press release, which includes text of all three articles, practically verbatim.

Fortunately, things aren’t as bad as they once were for the women of the UK – merely a year ago, coincidentally around the start of the new football season, The Metro reported the number of men turning down sex ‘sessions’ for the ‘footy’ was catastrophically higher:

Finally there’s some proof that men would rather watch football than have sex

For every woman that has tried to unbutton her boyfriend’s jeans while whispering dirty thoughts in his ear only to be ignored while he fixates on the football – you are not alone.

A new survey has revealed that 40 per cent of men would rather get stuck into watching a Saturday afternoon match on the screen rather than have sex.

It’s a sad time for civilisation isn’t it?

Source: The Metro, 14th August 2014

So the news is good – in just under a year, men are turning their back on football in their droves, in order to focus on their partners! Rejoice!

Or, both of these polls are unreliable, being as they are simple opportunistic adverts for a sports betting company (2015) and a sex toy company (2014). I can’t wait to see who will be hiring OnePoll to help patronise football fans this time next year!