Have you ever noticed how useless men are at working a washing machine, or how they can’t fathom how to work a hoover, or how even ensuring they figure out how to cover their caveman bodies with rudimentary fabrics each day can be considered a remarkable achievement given their inherent lack of any kind of intelligence?
If so, you’re not alone, as was ably demonstrated in the news this week:
Half of men can’t use a washing machine properly and a quarter can’t even figure out how to switch it on
News has come in which may not come as a surprise to women used to hearing every excuse under the sun.
A new study now reveals more than half (58 per cent) of British men ‘can’t use a washing machine properly’ because they find the household appliance ‘confusing’.
What’s more, a quarter of women (25 per cent) admit their partner cannot work the washing machine at all.
According to the research 16 to 24 year olds are most reluctant to do their own laundry, the most popular excuse being not knowing what buttons to press (40 per cent).
If you were in any doubt at how hapless and useless men are, just look at the photo, with the poor Theo Walcott lookalike not even smart enough to figure out that the clothes go IN the machine, not just ON it. Those poor confused, ‘feeble’ creatures, it’s a wonder they haven’t died of their own hapless idiocy yet – it’s a good job, frankly, that there are women-folk, media outlets and commercial corporations to take pity on them and hold their hands through this whole complex and baffling modern life. Commercial corporations who sell washing machines, in fact:
Ian Moverley, of household appliance manufacturer Indesit who conducted the survey, said: ‘Our study found many people in the UK are confused by their washing machines.
‘Typical excuses about ‘not knowing what buttons to press’ will be a thing of the past with the world’s first socially powered laundry service.’
So it transpires that the company wishing to tell the world that men are useless, hapless and feckless idiots is a washing machine manufacturer, looking to launch ‘socially powered laundry’. You might wonder what ‘socially powered laundry’ is – the answer is simple:
The laundry scheme, named ‘Push and Wash’, will offer Brits the chance to have their laundry collected, washed and handed back to them clean the next day.
Twitter users can register their interest for the service by messaging @IndesitUK on the social media service with the hashtag ‘pushandwash’.
Or, in summary, it’s generic marketing bullshit. Still, there’s one great thing about the #pushandwash campaign, and the sexist marketing Indesit use to sell it – you get to tweet them and tell them how interested you are in their campaign. You might, for example, want to ask them where the evidence is that men are so useless, and how they conducted their research, and what questions they used, and what their methodology was. You might want to ask them where their data is, as I did:
Or you might want to explain to them that writing off an entire gender as useless and moronic might not be the most effective marketing strategy.
Remember – they want to hear what you think. @IndesitUK and #pushandwash.